letting
sleeping
babies
lie.

. . . . .

wishing
vee's
aunt
suzy
a
happy birthday!

xo

today
valerie
turns
3 weeks old.
it's hard
to believe.

one would think
that feeding,
changing diapers,
and sleeping
would feel
like eternity
but
it zooms by...

we
still feel
like rookies...
making
a lot of
mistakes
and constantly
worrying.

. . . . .

we have been
venturing
out with vee.

a cafe
for
grub's birthday...



a train trip
to Morat/Murten...



there have been
successes
and
big disasters.

. . . . .

oma went
home
to the USA
this week...



and
we all really
miss her



especially
valerie.

. . . .

vee
has been
teaching us
a lot
about
what
she likes
and
doesn't like...



she doesn't like
to be
swaddled
anymore
or
so it seems...



she is fascinated
by all things
black & white...



she loves
to sleep in
daddy's arms..



. . . . .



we are tired
a lot
and still
trying
to adjust
to our new life
with valerie.
it's easy
to forget
the hard parts
when you
see her face
or
hear her
laugh
in her sleep.

happy
3 weeks
wee grub!



xo

what's in a name?

early on
in
the
having-a-baby
discussion
grub and i
decided that
if it was
a girl
i would pick the name
and
if it was
a boy
grub would pick the name.
we both would
have veto power
but
should exercise it
with restraint.

most people
of my generation
seek names
that are unusual.
many of my friends
named their kids
names that i hadn't
heard before
and
then suddenly
it seemed
everyone had
collectively
named
their
kid
austin,
ruby,
atticus,
or
{fill in unusual name}.
it was like
we all shared
a collective
unconsciousness
in the naming
department.

i decided that
i wanted
to name
our daughter
after
an important
woman in my family.
someone i wanted
her to remember.
the choice
was simple
in my case...
my grandmother
valerie.

i never really
knew my grandmother
but always wished
i did.



valerie dhervilliez
was
my father's mother.
she was born
in nancy, france
and orphaned
during
the first world war.
she lived with
her grandfather
until he died
and then
was shuffled
around from
relative to relative
until
she was 16
and left france
to live with
her aunt in nyc.



we shared
so many loves.
she was crafty.
she embroidered,
knitted,
and crocheted.
she
salvaged items
from the trash
and
brought home
finds
from antique stores
(much to
my grandfather's chagrin).
when she traveled
she put together
detailed scrapbooks

and photo albums
with careful documentation
of everything
they did.

she died
when i was 5.
i have
few
scant
memories of her.
the one
i remember
most clearly
was of her
cooking
my brother and i
breakfast.
she was
pouring me
a glass of
orange juice
into
one of those
glasses
with the
oranges painted
on the side.

. . . . .

flynn,
on the other hand,
is one of those
trendier names
but both
grub and i
liked it.
the nurse
practitioner
who we saw
throughout
the pregnancy
in the states
was k. flynn.
we decided
that boy or girl
we would give
them flynn
as a middle name.



grub calls her flynn.
i call her vee.
but of course
oma calls her
valerie.

xo

another week.
yep.
just trudging
along
at this point.

not much
else
to say...
wee grub is
demanding
more space
and
more food
and the hills
and steps
get harder
for me
to climb
each day.
but
i am happy
as long
as
wee grub
is growing
and
i can put
my feet up
and
knit
when
i get home.

. . . . .

grub and i
are in love
with
T’es fou Louloup.
a
collection
from france.
we bought
one of
their toys
when
we were
in antibes:

Source: ebulobo.com via gwen on Pinterest

the story
is
a bizarre twist
of the classic
tale of
red riding hood
and the big
bad wolf.
oh, and
red riding hood
carries
a cell phone
of course.

check out
this
hysterical
video
of a guy
with a super thick
french accent
reading
the
wolf story:




these toys
are
almost
impossible
to find here
but
there is
a store
that sells them
in the usa
(hint hint).

c'est tout!
xo

each week
i find myself
with less
and less
to say.
as the weeks
until the due date
are fewer and fewer
grub and i
try to absorb
the reality
of wee grub
making his/her
entrance into
our world.

as we listen
to our midwife
tell us the details
of birth
or
i go
to yoga sessions
and practice
exercises,
it's no more
real to us
then it was
a week ago
or a month ago.

we find ourselves
reminding
each other
of what changes
are to come.
for example,
the other day
as we sat
on the balcony
quietly eating
our
dinner
and chatting
as the sun set,
grub said,
soon we won't
have this quiet time
anymore.
almost more
to himself
than to me.

. . . . .

this week
we went to
a MEGA baby store
to look for
some sort
of bassinet
for by our bed.
we were overwhelmed
with how much
everything costs,
all the stuff
that
you are convinced
that
you need to buy,
and
all the parents
filling their carts
with all
these accessories
they hope will make
the transition
to parenthood
easier.
all i knew was
i wanted
out of there
as soon as possible.
after some debate
and
price-comparing
we settled on
the
stokke daybed:


i am a bit
embarrassed
since
i am painfully aware
that they market
this line
specifically
to people like
grub & i...
as shown in
this lovely advert
of mom working
on her mac
as she watches
the baby:


oh well.
i couldn't take
all the
pink and blue
anymore.
i had
to.
get.
out.
of.
there.

c'est tout.
xo


{outtake}

i have heard
that
the third trimester
drags
and
by the end of it
you just want
that baby out!
that's not how
i feel at all...

when
we couldn't
tell anyone
i was pregnant
and
we were waiting
to clear
the first trimester
that seemed to drag
(well except for
the dissertation-
writing part)
but
the third trimester
is speeding by
so fast
i barely have time
to experience it.
wee grub can stay
in there
'til the
last
possible
minute
because
i have
so much research
to get done
i need every week.

so please
wee grub
no early exits,
okay?!

we finally
bought some
furniture
for the baby room.
i would have liked
to buy
all used furniture
but
i searched and searched
but found nothing
that suited
our aesthetics
or was
in our price range.
so
we
we became
slaves
to the
ikea showroom.

i was pretty excited
to get
the crib and
dresser/changing table
assembled
so i could
unpack and organize
all the
stuff
that has been
in boxes
all over
the floor
in the baby room.
so when grub
asked
if we could
wait until
38 weeks
to assemble
the crib
because
he feels
a little superstitious...
well,
let's just say
i wasn't wild
about the idea.
but
i took it
pretty well.



honestly,
i can relate
to where he's
coming from...
in many cultural
traditions
it's bad luck
to bring baby things
into the house
before
the baby is born.
normally
i like the idea
but
i have been feeling
particularly
antsy
about being prepared.
so we will
assemble the dresser
so i can put
things away
but
wait on the crib
for a
few
more
weeks.

. . . . .

we met our
new midwife
this past sunday.
she is great.
i like her a lot
and
she was very helpful.
you can see her
website here.

so now
i have
yoga
and
we have
midwife lessons
every week
for the next
few weeks.
she is taking
us on a tour
of the hospital
next week.
fortunately
the hospital
is only
a
4 minute walk
from
our apartment!

. . . . .

well,
that's
the news
from here.
until
next time.



xo

the countdown
continues...
8 weeks
to go.

i was just
telling
my colleague
(and
wee grub)
that
she/he is not
allowed
to be early.
or at least
she/he
has to wait
until
my mom arrives
on the
4th of september!

this past week
wee grub
has been
growing fast
and my belly
feels stretched
beyond its limits.
i often have
to rub my belly
because
a foot, butt,
or hand
is pressed
hard against
my belly.
it's uncomfortable
but also
really cool.

it's strange
to think that
i am growing
this baby inside
but when
she/he comes
out i will have
to get to know
her/him
the same way
grub will...
i have no advantage
because i carried
wee grub...
she/he will still
be a stranger to us
at first
with a personality
that slowly unfolds.

i had
a brief ultrasound
on thursday
to check
wee grub's growth:


{click to enlarge}

she/he weighed in
at 2050 grams
or 4.5 lbs!
just average-
not too big,
not too small.

on monday
i went
to
the cute little
town nearby-
Auvernier


{not my photo!
photo from here}

nested
among vineyards
overlooking
the lake
for my
private
yoga class.
i learned
all about
my cervix
and exercises
to try
to open it up
just a bit
so wee grub
can get out
with the least
resistance possible.
my teacher was great
and even had
a reproduction
skeletal pelvis
to show me
different parts
and what i was
trying to move
and stretch.
it reminded me
of when i taught
human evolution
& bipedality.
i will go to her
every week for the next
5 weeks...
grub will join me
the last week
to learn some ways
he can help me
during labor.

this sunday
we will meet
our new midwife.
i had another
midwife
but she was not
right for me
so i decided
to go with someone new.
she works at the hospital
where i will deliver
so if my luck is with me
i may have her
as my midwife for
delivery
(fingers crossed)
because you get
whomever is
on duty.

i am starting
to feel
a little
more prepared.

this weekend
we are off
to ikea
to buy a crib
and some baby stuff
along
with
our bed
and
dining room table
woohoo!

xo

{click to enlarge}

today
we deal
with a very important
topic.
wee grub's
wardrobe.


{click to enlarge}

i finally
had a chance
to sit and
draw
my
wee grub closet
planner
{thus far}
this weekend.


{click to enlarge}

i had some
quiet time
to organize.


{click to enlarge}

i gravitate
towards
solids & stripes
and
bold patterns.
i don't really
like cutsie
with the occasional
exception.

grub
would
prefer to
have
everything
in
white.
surprised?
thought not.
when our friend
annemarie
brought us
nijntje clothes
from the netherlands,
grub reconsidered
and now
wants
wee grub
to wear all
nijntje clothes.

some of
the clothes
i love:


{from our dc neighbors}


{thrifted
by aunty kiyomi-
i love
the aden and anais brand}


{thrifted
by aunty astrid}


{from
aunty eliza}


{a decadent
purchase of
something new}

also
all our new
nijntje
and
jip & janneke
clothes
from
aunty annemarie!

. . . . .

i think grub
thought
i had bought
too many clothes
but when
we graphed it out
we realized
we have very little...
especially considering
our bizarre
laundry schedule
{we can only use
the machine
every 10 days}!
also
all the thrift stores
are closed
for july vacations
so i can't
thrift shop again
until
early august.
how can they
do this to me?!

so yes,
we do still
need clothes
so feel free
to thrift
some stylish
baby clothes
for us.



so experienced
mamas & papas...
what are some
essentials?

some things
to consider:
month 1 - 2.5:
swiss autumn
(sept to mid-nov)
month 2.5 - 6:
hot mexico weather
(mid-nov to mid-feb)
month 6 & onward:
swiss late winter & beyond
(mid feb & on)

any advice?

i will post
a 32 week update
in a day or two...
a lot has happened...
wee grub had
a doctor's appt.,
went on a long swim
with me,
and
i had
my first
birth preparation
yoga class!

more soon.
xo

the countdown
begins...
only
9 weeks
(or so)
to go!

it is
totally
freaking me out.
how did
31 weeks
zoom by?!
oh yeah,
i wrote my
dissertation,
we moved
to switzerland,
and
i started
a post-doc
all in the last
31 weeks.

i guess
it's been a busy
31 weeks.

still,
i am
no where
near ready
{guess you never
really are}
i told grub
that i am
sure i will
prepare
in the typical
bugheart-way,
i.e.
cram everything
into
the very last
possible minute.
so typical.

nothing new
to report.
i use to
feel bigger
than i looked.
now i
look bigger
than i feel.
i caught a
glimpse
of myself
in a window
this weekend
and
i thought
holy moly
i look BIG.
grub said,
well...YEAH!
but he looks
at me every day.

wee grub
has been
pushing
her/his
little
feet and hands
hard into my sides.
it's kung fu
in my belly.
it
can be
pretty uncomfortable.
i feel bad
because
i know
it must be
getting crowded
in there.

well,
that's all to report.
i will do a post
mid-week
this weekend
on
our baby clothing
update
for all of you
who are
dying
to know
how my
thrift shopping
for the baby
in switzerland
is going...
i am doing it
in the style of
my travel planners-
something like
this:


until then...
xo

this week
i
turned
37 years,
grub
went
to paris,
and
wee grub
turned
30 weeks.

i'd be a liar
if i said
i wasn't
a little worried
about having
a baby over 35
but then
at the same time
i don't think
that it would
have been
right for us
any time sooner.
we wouldn't
give up the years
we had with
just
the
2 of us.

now we are
ready
to be 3.

wee grub
definitely
has
a personality
and
a schedule.
she/he
is quite
the little
night owl!
kicking
a pushing
his/her
little feet against
my belly
when i am
in positions
that don't
suit
her/him.
i am hitting
another
growth spurt
and
i feel like
my belly is
stretching
by the minute-
feels like
what
happened
to aunt marge.

this week
was also
the week of nesting.
we are trying
to make
our huge apartment
a home
little by little.
most rooms
are empty or sparse
but
grub is enjoying
it while he can.


{living room}

{dining area}

{guest room/office}

{wee grub's room}

{our room}

later this month
we hope
to get
a crib,
dining room table
and
our bed.
for now
we are sleeping
in the guest room.
the baby room
and
our bedroom
are pretty much
empty.
we have to be
patient.
we checked out
some thrift stores
this weekend
and thrifted
a hallway
bench.



unfortunately
several
thrift stores
we closed due
to some
bizarre
incomprehensible
holiday
schedule.

for now
we are
living sparsely
and
enjoying our view.




xo

p.s.
wee grub's
current
favorite song:
paris 2004.